Unmerited Favor

Elida children's home, in Coimbatore India, authenticates in a tangible manner the restorative nature of God's heart for His children. 
It is inspiring to see and hear testimony of the transforming work of the Holy Spirit and the hope that does not disappoint anchored only in Christ!

The children's day begins with prayer and ends with worship, which in and of itself speaks volumes of the dedication to keep Christ central and foremost in everything that this ministry does.

Children come from varying backgrounds, but through Jesus, the love of the staff, prayer, discipleship, and the Word, many have a very secure future!!     

The children in these homes are taken such good care of, and truly loved well. I enjoyed seeing their precious personalities and the playful grins that were rather irresistible :)
The food is prepared by the staff and the children have chores and responsibilities given them also, it is neat to see them help set up for church and wash their clothes.

This beautiful woman pictured on the left, D'Jonna, is a dentist in South Dakota and uses her profession in India to help with the health of these children. The relationships that she has built over time are strong and the children know she is kind and can be trusted to investigate their mouths. The newer children are encouraged by those who have gone before and they speak highly of her sweet spirit!

D'Jonna has a heart of gold. I know her to be extremely genuine and selfless. One afternoon I had the pleasure of sitting in our room/dentist office and discussing the consistency of missional living. She is invested in these kids and this ministry, it is inspiring to listen to her heart

Priya and Linda have been collaborating to invest in the tastiness of this fabulous bakery-also a part of the ministry at Elida. Linda selflessly provided boxes of bakery items from the states to be experimented with by these lovely workers. It is a joy to see her passion and love for the bakery.

The team and I were spoiled with wonderful baked goods almost everyday! I will be honest and say that they were delicious, every single time :)
Some of the boys who have grown up in the boys home are pictured above, they are learning how to use this tool for business.

There was much travel that took place over the 11 days spent in the south. One particular trip took us 6 hours one way to reach a church in a very remote place where this shepherd pictured on the left lived. He captures the rugged beauty of this region quite well!

The church that you see pictured here on the right is the building that Hope church, Bentonville, raised the money to build. This area is infested with cobras and false doctrine, so it was beyond exciting to see truth and no snakes the day that we went!

Ron Wilson, pictured here with Linda his wife and the Paul family, has an incredibly generous heart! His life is characterized by selflessness and all who come to know him are blessed by his love! He organized our trip and is very highly respected by all who come to know him in India as well as the states.

Mike Shaffer and Ron Wilson have been consistently going to India for many years now and seek to continue the wonderful relationships already built. Mike LOVES to play with the children and boy do they enjoy playing with him too!! It was a joy to witness their interactions :)

These two men on the left are Hope Pastors! Rob Leitheiser pastors a church in Florida and Jim Brewer is my pastor here in Arkansas. I am grateful for their fun and vivacious personalities on this trip, they made us all laugh! They are also extremely Godly men who faithfully serve Him and His people.

This is the whole group, including Scott who has taken all of these professional pictures you have been seeing :) We were immensely blessed by the love, hospitality, and enjoyment that our hosts, the Paul's, brought to us while in their home and on the road!

Suffering: Pain vs. Joy

One night a group of us were on our way back from the markets, where we had found some gifts for friends and family. I was following Sutee, our driver, and dodging motorcycles as we crossed the street. We had only to walk through an open mall and we would be back to the car. It was evening and I was hungry, but soon lost all appetite when I saw a man begging on the very same road that I would have to be going by. It was not his begging that upset me, though I dislike seeing that too, but it was his leg. He was old, and his body was worn, one leg was healthy, but the other completely turned around from the knee down to the foot, which was extremely deformed. I had never seen a leg so disfigured and it really bothered me. I was nearing him and wanted to know if the pain was etched in his face or just his leg, so I-without thinking- looked up. He looked directly in my eyes and I will be honest and say, I looked away. 

Pain, more than a physical ache~almost a soul-ish wound, can be attributed to some suffering. I have seen hurting people before and kept my eyes locked on theirs, even though it hurt. I was studying physical therapy in college and had a pediatric clinical that made me acutely aware of pains infliction. That clinical may have been the deciding factor for why I am not a PT today. Pain has always bothered me, even today it does, as my Mom is sitting with ice on her knee before going to the doctor tomorrow to have the fluid taken off. Truth be told, this is where I crumble in apologetic's: pain and suffering. Why does God heal some and not others? Why does suffering have to be a part of this life? These are the questions that I wrestle with and sometimes even cry about. But there is another type of suffering that confuses me even more, and really makes me question my life and its purpose. I will tell you about another set of eyes, these had hope rather than despair.

The leader of the ministry that we went to collaborate with in Coimbatore, John Paul, is a gentle and kind man. His eyes speak more than his lips and in them rests the Spirit of the Living God. He leads his family in righteousness and desires to honor the Lord in all of his actions. Philippians 2 could very easily be attributed to his lifestyle: humility and selflessness surround him! His wife, Ana, is a prayer warrior, a mother and a worshiper. If I could try to sum her up in one phrase it would be, "fiercely tender." I felt so welcomed by their hospitality and genuine spirits. I knew that it would be difficult to say good bye the very first day I met them, but not until our departure did I discover the weight of that initial emotion. My life is richer in knowing them!
Prayer is life to this family, more frequent than tea and rice. I was compelled by their trust and fearlessness in God, whom they know and believe. The short encounter I had with John Paul and Ana shed light on the years of diligence I was not able to witness first hand. I saw in them roots of faith that had been weathered through storms and hope that anchored them to their Savoir. Suffering had produced in them a dependence in Jesus that was authentic. Their testimony of our Lord increased my joy in Him and encouraged me to live a life that would convey His heart and hope. They have suffered, but their suffering produced a joy and this was strange. 
Joy, not just a happy smile, but a deep and unwavering hopeful abode of peace. This joy was evident in their lives and the only reason that I know it to be so, is because God has placed it there. They surrendered their pain, they relinquished their suffering and because of God's mercy they have now been given the gift of joy! 
This is where my apologetic's crumble: pain and suffering. How is God so merciful? Why does He love us so well? Why does He have compassion at all? Why grace? His hesed, His loving-kindness is amazing and beyond my comprehension. I am overwhelmed by who He is. My prayer is that I would not bring accusation against my Lord when pain and suffering upset me, but that I would trust Him. 

I want that man, with a disfigured leg and ache in his eyes, to know the joy that is only possible in Jesus. I want to know it too.

Tea Tales

The second day in Coimbatore we woke before the sun to travel to Ooty, a hill station located about three or four hours north. Ooty is a popular attraction for tourists as well as locals. It offers a beauty and escape that can only truly be experienced to be fully understood. Reaching an elevation of just under 8,000ft, Ooty was an adventure to drive up and down. Tea plantations cover the landscape as you ascend and it is beautiful! Monkeys and colorful flowers beg your eyes to be diverted from the nauseating roads. There is a mountain face that takes your breath away, especially at sunrise!

D’Jonna, Katie and I got to bunk in a very cute British hotel that had a heater we all thought looked more like an overhead projector, and only found it after a night spent under all of the covers with our jackets on, lol! Yes, it actually gets cold in India! It was a lovely stay and our hotel made us feel extremely spoiled with all of its amenities.

In among these hills rest several churches that we had the pleasure of visiting. Our first day we attended five churches and were delighted in each by their warm hospitality and genuine worship! I was lavished with gifts at almost every stop and was humbled by the joyful and selfless generosity that overflowed from these precious and content hearts. In the evening we were able to attend two house churches and my spirit felt very close to Heaven; being around Jesus in people makes me want to be with Him in person!!

Tea has a way of making me miss my Mom! She loves to drink tea and often :) She and I have enjoyed sipping the tea that I bought while in Ooty and sharing stories of the ways in which God continues to grow our faith in Him, not too different than the way that tea grows and is then exposed to the harsh conditions (heat, pressure or both) which arouse its flavor and prepare it for use. I came home with a deeper appreciation for my family. My parents and I have always been close, but while in Coimbatore I was inspired and convicted about how the west seems to view family compared to the east. I will say, as an American, that I have much to learn with regards to relationships. Blesson and I were able to have a discussion about arranged marriages one afternoon and I was struck by the blessing of parental involvement and the essence of prayer, trust, and dependence on the Lord and wisdom from our family to heed His direction in choosing a mate. He gave the analogy that dating can sometimes be like tape stuck and unstuck continuously, leading to, over time, the loss of its stickiness. I was thankful to listen and learn from his wise counsel. I am extremely grateful that God has blessed me with godly parents who are praying for the Lord's will to be done in my life! I know He answers those prayers, because He says so: John 14:14 and 1 John 5:14, and He can be trusted :) It is easy to want my will instead of His; I am being taught what obedience looks like in this area currently.

Chili Pepper Sneezes

The sun was happily half way through its morning stroll as we drove into Pollachi on Wednesday afternoon. Jim, Aaron and I were excited to see where the new church would be built-but little did we know that we would begin by seeing where its members met at present. In-between two rough walls sat a beautiful congregation of brown eyed brothers and sisters! The little roof was a patch work of bamboo sticks and straw, and maybe a little tin too. A young boy played a simple beat on his drum and their Tamil worship continued, but with a little white skinned distraction interspersed. I was invited to lead an English song, and Jim found it necessary that I use the tambourine happily quieted at his end of the table in front of the church. So I very Pentecostally shook it and led them in “Every Move I Make.”

The Pastor of this humble church began to express to us the measure of their gratitude for our commitment to fund the building project. He explained that just outside of the curtain hanging behind him was a wash area for clothes-which in India is quite a loud process. Clothes are first soaked in water, then scrubbed on a sheet of metal with a brush or just hand and rinsed. The whipping action for drying the clothes is what is so loud though. Little concrete squares are lashed with the clothing to beat out the water. This was cause enough to need a different location in my mind, but he continued. Chili peppers were gathered in large baskets just outside and were popped and divided by workers daily. He explained to us that often his congregation would sneeze and cry because of the potent and irritating scent. The rent for their small space was high and did not allow for room or functionality for any type of celebration, growth in numbers, or sustainability. The heart that spoke to us, as a leader in his congregation, was humbled and blessed by the visual and tangible expression of grace being given in the financial gifts of those we were simply their to convey as Ambassadors from Hope Church, and ultimately our Savior!

I was the only American woman on this particular journey, so I was already singled out without much trouble, but at the end of the service I was especially noticed because little camera phones were boldly desiring to capture my image for keeps. I was asked to pose with the young and the old, so I did with pink cheeks! It was about the third picture in when I noticed a burning sensation in my eyeballs and little pools of tears started to leak out the corners of my eyes. I think they must have thought I was really touched by their love, but then my throat began to feel thick on the inside and I knew this was not normal. Then the worst part began, loud boy sneezes came rifling through my nostrils before I had much time to react, and there were not just one or two folks, I mean these were like 12 in succession! I walked out from under the little roof and saw the culprits being popped into baskets, bright and colorful red chili peppers were boasting their fragrance something fierce! I had never experienced a reaction quite like I did in Pollachi that afternoon, but it made me even more grateful for Kleenex and a new building being built for our sweet brothers and sisters.

After meeting with the congregation we were taken to the location where the building will begin being constructed. The plot of land that has been purchased is nestled up close to plenty of opportunity to reach their neighbors for Christ. Pray for the pastor and the church as this will also cause potential confrontation to have a church built in a staunch Hindu area. It is a blessing to know that our church in America has been able to collaborate with a church in India to simply obey the desires of our Lord!

While we were looking around the land, some of the villagers came up and wanted to see one of the guys in our team, Vince. They began calling him Tom Cruise and wanting his picture. At first it was funny and we all enjoyed a laugh, but then the crowd increased and it became a bit more aggressive. Jonathan asked that we get in the bus and we all obliged without much hesitation. The door of the bus was even crowded with villagers trying to reach out for one more touch of famous flesh! It was a really interesting experience, and I think that "Tom Cruise" will now be known in that village where the church is being built. Vince does not really resemble Tom Cruise, but Aaron, who is definitely not Asian at all was called Jet Lee, and that made us laugh really hard!!! 

Tender Truth. Part 1

                              Tender Truth
A short story that is based on research, but completely made up by my own imagination. This is the first section. More to come...

Isaac tenderly lifted Emma, his sleeping beautiful girl, cradling her inside the safety of his arms. Beauty and the Beast and bed time had collided onto the floor with Emma's favorite stuffed animal and blanket and left her dreaming, with her thumb in her mouth. It was in the moments, such as these, that Isaac would be tempted to stay awake all night just to watch her, that frame that held him in such wonder and amazement! Emma did not know it yet, but she was one of Isaac's biggest motivations to keep going, she kept him steady in the storms that swept over him daily. It had only been 15 months since Lila had passed away, Isaac's wife and companion. He loved her, fully, but on nights like this, he felt a lack-and wished desperately for her to see their child asleep in his arms, to have her gentle touch on his back that prickled his skin and awakened desire. Quietly he walked to Emma's bedroom and tucked her in, kissing her with a prayer for good dreams and health. Thick with emotion and heavy feet, Isaac made his way to the side of his bed and dropped to his knees, allowing the heaviness in his heart to be taken to the throne of Jesus.

Morning routines were becoming much easier, and Emma cried less as he dropped her off at daycare before heading to work. Isaac was making headway in the development of the project that his boss had given him two months prior. He had been asked to research, as any good journalist would be, and write an article on the affects that post-abortion has on women. Many women can empathize in ways that men could never aspire to do, in this particular topic, but Isaac had been asked to do the impossible and try. Perspective does what experience sometimes is not be capable of, and Isaac was gaining much perspective by reading, and interviewing therapists, doctors, nurses, and very knowledgeable people with the department of heath. This week held his most disheartening assignment: interviewing the very women who had chosen to have the procedure done, and were suffering with the affects. 

                                                         ~

Chelsea Gray sat on a bench in the soothing sun, the chatter of birds overhead and a quiet breeze blowing through the leaves in the trees that surrounded the lovely park. It had been a busy afternoon at the hotel desk, taking calls and dealing with impatient guests, and this break was much needed before she began her evening shift at the diner down the street. Chelsea closed her eyes and listened, hoping that nature's sounds would be louder than the thoughts that plagued her mind. She could not get away from the pain, discomfort, and very heavy shame that clouded every second of her days and even nights. It had been three weeks since Ethan had broken up with her, only three. He was all she had left, and now she felt emptier than the afternoon her parents disowned her. The worst feeling any human being can experience is being unwanted, to be shoved out of lives because of a mistake, to be treated like less and thought of without dignity. Chelsea knew, she knew very well, how awful falling in love with Ethan and displaying that love had cost her, she knew of the consequence that presented itself in her womb. She felt it had been a consequence, one that could be eliminated and forgotten. Ethan had been the one who suggested she get rid of it, to have a fresh start with him, so she could finish school and he could get a decent job. Bitterness swelled and she fought the tears that often came with his name. A tear slipped out of her control and landed on the midsection of her shirt, just a little insignificant droplet of salt filled with rage, but its placement daunting!

                                                      ~

Chelsea’s evening was slow at the diner, the regulars sat with their coffee and gossip, a few new faces stood out, but they were friendly and etched with a need for some nutrients. She delighted in serving the community their dinners, to see the same faces regularly, though she knew more of their lives then they knew of her own. It was a small town, but those who preferred to be known were and those who kept to themselves were only known by assumption.

The door jingled with two lovely mid aged women entering with an appetite. Chelsea greeted them and sat them in the booth with the window she liked to gaze through the most. They both ordered sweet teas and the daily special. With two cold teas in her hand, Chelsea came toward the booth and overheard their conversation. “Norma Jean told me that her husband’s company, Stericycle, is being investigated because of their disposal of fetuses after they are aborted, it is just medical waste, and I do not understand why they are in so much hot water!” Chelsea slowed her steps, her body stiffened. 

The lady opposite her, shrugged her shoulders in agreement, and emphatically replied, "I think that Stericycle is doing the duty in a much more humane way than other places, I have no problem with incineration!" 

Chelsea felt the nausea, felt the eyes of the customers as she dropped off their glasses and quickly headed for the restroom, she was not ready to take their order, even if they were. 

                                                       ~

Thoughts, dark and thick with a tangibility of fear and guilt were dancing around the room, seducing her vulnerability; asking her to flirt with the edge of life, as Chelsea lay in her bed that night. Why had she never asked herself what would be done with her child's remains, how could she have blocked out such important information? The internet was a powerful source of condemnation as she read site after site of stats and facts, each adding to the disconcerting emotions that left her hopeless. The desire to live drained out of her veins, and she did not want to fight it. The letters "PASS" came up in her search engine and she clicked on it. "Post Abortion Stress Syndrome" is what it stood for she found, and tears again streamed down her distressed face as she read the very thoughts that had been plaguing her journal for months! The website gave a number that could be dialed for anyone suffering to have some help, even just an ear. 

Grace and my flesh

Sunday in Church we began a new series, "What is a Christian?" It was fabulous! I am looking forward to next Sunday, very much :)
I drive a wonderful friend home every week, she is new to America, and still a bit overwhelmed by all this "Christianity." We were able to have some quiet reflection as the miles went and then began to digest what was heavily on our hearts. It was frustrating and delightful to hash out some of the mistaken identity in what a Christian should be like; to put it bluntly, it forced us both to want to dig in to the Bible to get a very clear understanding of who Christ is-that we may be associated by His likeness. It is a journey, discipleship tends to be :) I have no doubt that it is going to be messy, difficult, joyful, and exciting as we try to lay aside the stereotypical view and try to focus in on Christ alone as the example, that we may truly be called Christians!
This week I began reading "The Ragamuffin Gospel" by Brennan Manning. It is certainly refreshing! One particular part has glued it's truth to heart, and I HAVE to share it!! I think that out of context, it still will jolt that flesh and massage your Spirit :)
"Our response to the love of Jesus demands trust. do we rely on our resume or the gospel of grace?"

Flannel and Girl Scout Cookies

It is snowing, and it is the end of March; I like surprises :)
This month I sewed up some stuffed animals while sweet and innocent four year olds held their paws and comforted them with all sorts of honesty, It was super! Who knew sewing projects could be so emotional?!
I had on my list that I was going to learn how to play three simple songs on the guitar, but that has not yet happened, and I am not sure that it will. I am ok with that ~ next month has room for some strumming :)

April: I am excited for you to come! I have decided to make this list of learning a little more well rounded, not just giving my mind a chance for experimentation, but also letting my spirit taste a little bit of vulnerability as well. I am going to share Jesus with someone, intentionally-face to face, once a week. Some mornings I am a bit unmotivated, so I am going to wake up and practice gratitude :) Carrying over from last month, I am going to learn how to play at least one song on the guitar. And last but not least, I am going to a recycling center to see what it is they do with all the pizza boxes and milk cartons my kiddos supply them with! Why? You may ask...honestly because I am curious...and I am interested in learning more about stewardship after teaching on the topic to my 9yr olds this year in Bible!