Flannel and Girl Scout Cookies

It is snowing, and it is the end of March; I like surprises :)
This month I sewed up some stuffed animals while sweet and innocent four year olds held their paws and comforted them with all sorts of honesty, It was super! Who knew sewing projects could be so emotional?!
I had on my list that I was going to learn how to play three simple songs on the guitar, but that has not yet happened, and I am not sure that it will. I am ok with that ~ next month has room for some strumming :)

April: I am excited for you to come! I have decided to make this list of learning a little more well rounded, not just giving my mind a chance for experimentation, but also letting my spirit taste a little bit of vulnerability as well. I am going to share Jesus with someone, intentionally-face to face, once a week. Some mornings I am a bit unmotivated, so I am going to wake up and practice gratitude :) Carrying over from last month, I am going to learn how to play at least one song on the guitar. And last but not least, I am going to a recycling center to see what it is they do with all the pizza boxes and milk cartons my kiddos supply them with! Why? You may ask...honestly because I am curious...and I am interested in learning more about stewardship after teaching on the topic to my 9yr olds this year in Bible!

yellow dresses

My laptop screen has taken me on many journeys today, across oceans and inside of the thin map that I tend to be distracted by every day in my room. I have seen faces dark with color or despair, sometimes both-each longing for hope and joy. I have seen needs...some actually genuine, others obscured by the American eye, and I am eager to help. The desire to simply be present is very strong, to live simplistically, with a tough environment and resilient people by my side. Gratitude and love, what more do we need in our lives?

If you notice...

If you happen to notice a woman with ink smudges and slightly disheveled hair, compliment her eyes-for with them she notices scenes in the everyday atmosphere that most would ignore. If you could hold her journal for ten minutes, you would be astonished at how she views the world, maybe even inspired. I would even go so far as to advise you to ask her to coffee, and enjoy some time listening to her heart or mind, come with a bag of questions, but do not be surprised at how effortlessly she diverts the questions to you-it is in her nature, that learner must know and will remain curious even as she delights you with her tails. She will remember every detail about you, from the socks that sneak a peek at the world only when you sat cross legged, to the amount of times you play with your hair-if it was gelled or natural, etc. She will take special notice of your eyes, and she will see in them more than you would expect possible from such a woman. I can assure you of this, you will leave intrigued!

Questions on Love

What is love? Where does it reside and how can we experience its depths? Is there such a thing as shallow love, or medium love, etc. Where does its surface lie and how can it have weight without ever being measured? Can everyone give love or only some, and how can any give at all if not given them? Is love a preference or is love that which has no distinction? Is love an action? How is love expressed and can it be love without being expressed? Love is not singular-it is relational, no?? I am on a journey of understanding what love really is, would you like to come with me?

If God is love, can those who have no fellowship with Him really display such a word in their lives? Are we all endowed with it, since we are formed in His image? How does this, Love, really work??

Love is to be selfless, and yet, every idea of love depicted today seems to be contrary to that notion. Passion is the "new thing", you know what I mean? If you aren't being slapped, bitten, slammed up against a wall and "passionately" kissed then you are missing out! I struggle with the distinctions so often attributed to "love." It is like the spiritual and physical distinctions so present in our churches today! We should have no distinction from a selfless, kind, gentle and patient love that we give to our friends and a romantic and "passionate" love that we convey to our lovers. How have we so separated their definitions? 

words aptly spoken

Lovely words are inviting, special and contagious! I delight in hearing them, and am reminded today of the power of speaking them. Destructive words take the light out of glowing eyes, lower a chin, and harm the spirit. A look is powerful, but a word: striking!

I have learned in the 11 days that March has given of itself, that it is quick with its time. The sun is staying in our evening sky for a bit longer, but the days seem just as short. My list of things to learn has not yet begun, and instead of feeling overwhelmed, I am content in what the alternative has been. I think that the Lord is re-teaching me the power of "presence." To be near to someone in their time of need, giving a listening ear, a tender embrace, a smile. There is time to sit with someone, there always is, even though our clocks seem to beg for our attention, sometimes the most godly thing to do is to take their batteries out!
Jesus has also been wooing me to spend more time with Him! It has been a bit convicting to recognize the priority of my time, It holds more value than I give it credit.

A good book, a strong cup of tea, and a conversation with my mother: these are my plans for tonight!

I choose to be a learner

I began to make a list. This was not a sudden choice, it had been pondered while I was in India this summer. I had decided that my life in America was far to idle, I had too much down time and instead of spending it wisely, I was wasting time, and my life, on some experiences that left no real meaning. I made a decision then, and have since chosen to become a full time learner, who is not enrolled in any educational institute. This year has proven to be one of my busiest yet, as I am working more, but life will not slow down so it is up to choosing in the rush to be diligent! 

One of my dreams is to be a wife and mother, this is actually a growing passion and has roots of vision being formed, rather than just fanciful notions. Marriage and parenting, are a battlefield, a blessing and a very difficult selflessness. Why do I desire it so? God is a very good creator and has purposefully designed this into the very fabric of my person. He has also given me a vision to use the talents and gifts that He has blessed me with, as a means to save money and bless others. I am excited about being intentional now, while I am single, so that the discipline to learn will be firmly cemented before the Mrs and the Mom come along in my life :) 

I was recently introduced to the “Great books of the Western World”, an incredible collection of knowledge and tools to further understanding. My Mom and Dad purchased a few Elisabeth Elliot books for my birthday, which far exceed any measure of educational value! I have done some wood working with my Dad and will be doing some sewing projects this upcoming month with my Mom. This week I actually learned the most basic cast in fly fishing with my Pastor after church! Bravery has been a good companion with my efforts at painting on canvas, and Intrigue has helped my research on what God would have me daily practice as a “good steward” on this earth. It has been a little overwhelming to have such a lengthy list of things to learn, so I have chosen to make a list for each month, which is practical and achievable.

I believe that one of the necessary aspects of learning is also sharing that knowledge with others; I learn much better when I teach. This is, in part, why I have decided to start blogging about it! I am also one of those who has a very dire need to write down my thoughts, not just simply think on them…so this will be a place of digesting what it is that I learn! My hope is to write after each venture, sharing what it is I set out to learn, how it met with my expectations and what I encountered through the process. I hope you come along on these adventures!!